would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
