Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He shit in the fireplace
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
