Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I AM VODKA MAN
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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