Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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