You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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