Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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