I want to stick my p in your. b.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
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