You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
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