his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
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He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
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The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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