3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
420 ftw
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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