bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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