It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
