like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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