gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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