i barfeds in our rink
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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