Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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