Texts From Last Night

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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  Well thats $24,000 well spent.

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  (706): Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me. (1-706): Well thats $24,000 well spent. http://tfl.nu/bc5q
  Replies (35) Good night (3137) Bad night (933)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am

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  (641): i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am http://tfl.nu/xq9v
  Replies (30) Good night (5106) Bad night (728)
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  (650): View more from California

  Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...

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  (650): Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day... http://tfl.nu/p3lj
  Replies (51) Good night (6639) Bad night (1099)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.

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  (204): Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever. http://tfl.nu/wklp
  Replies (28) Good night (5678) Bad night (1575)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.

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  (360): I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels. http://tfl.nu/pla2
  Replies (12) Good night (5870) Bad night (1325)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.

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  (407): Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008. http://tfl.nu/vkb0
  Replies (9) Good night (4763) Bad night (852)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.

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  (601): I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished. http://tfl.nu/ezge
  Replies (33) Good night (5531) Bad night (2434)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.

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  (828): you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life. http://tfl.nu/zm5g
  Replies (12) Good night (7805) Bad night (1045)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out

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  (610): Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out http://tfl.nu/ac78
  Replies (7) Good night (3754) Bad night (1211)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.

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  (918): he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond. http://tfl.nu/174e
  Replies (4) Good night (1817) Bad night (925)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.

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  (508): he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him. http://tfl.nu/d83n
  Replies (4) Good night (1890) Bad night (910)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!

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  (479): I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning! http://tfl.nu/musz
  Replies (12) Good night (1599) Bad night (583)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.

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  (360): I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things. http://tfl.nu/6lmr
  Replies (2) Good night (388) Bad night (509)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage

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  (770): Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage http://tfl.nu/r3c2
  Replies (2) Good night (585) Bad night (266)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  nobody was home so I boiled the dildo

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  (413): nobody was home so I boiled the dildo http://tfl.nu/brzp
  Replies (8) Good night (466) Bad night (275)

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