STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
