id be glad to
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize
