It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
