We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize