where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
