either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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