At least make sure they are 18
Why
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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