I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
