And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize