he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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