marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Soap is not a condiment
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Randomize
