Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
