My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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