Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Even my vagina gasped.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
