this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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