look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
