Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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