wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
It was a blind-side dick pic.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
