I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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