would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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