the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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