whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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