i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
