yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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