Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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