guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My vagina is officially offended.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
