Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
