your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
