never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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