I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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