Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I think your dad took our porno
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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