Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
