Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
