went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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