Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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