p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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